{"id":3898,"date":"2019-04-30T10:49:27","date_gmt":"2019-04-30T07:49:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blog.annebebekkulubu.com\/?p=3898"},"modified":"2019-04-30T10:49:27","modified_gmt":"2019-04-30T07:49:27","slug":"cocuklari-sorgulamamaya-iten-sebepler","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/annebebekkulubu.com\/blog\/cocuklari-sorgulamamaya-iten-sebepler\/","title":{"rendered":"\u00c7ocuklar\u0131 sorgulamamaya iten sebepler"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span>\u00c7ocuklar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n ilerde ayaklar\u0131 yere sa\u011flam basan, g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015flerini h\u00fcrce ifade eden bireyler olmas\u0131n\u0131 isterken ebeveynler olarak aya\u011f\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131na s\u00fcrekli t\u00f6kezleyece\u011fi en b\u00fcy\u00fck ta\u015f\u0131 bazen biz anne ve babalar koyar\u0131z . \u015e\u00f6yle ki; \u00e7ocuk hen\u00fcz k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fckt\u00fcr, kendisini bir \u015fekilde ifade etmek ister. <\/span><b>\u015eunu \u015f\u00f6yle yapal\u0131m m\u0131 baba?<\/b><span> Sen daha k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcks\u00fcn kar\u0131\u015fma b\u00fcy\u00fcklerin i\u015fine denilerek cevab\u0131n\u0131 al\u0131r ve susar. Ergenlik \u00e7a\u011f\u0131na gelmi\u015ftir, gidecekleri tatil i\u00e7in fikir beyan etmek ister. Ailesi b\u0131rak\u0131n dinlemeyi sen evlen baklanda istedi\u011fini o zaman yapars\u0131n denilir ve yine susturulur. Evlenme \u00e7a\u011f\u0131na gelmi\u015f bir delikanl\u0131d\u0131r art\u0131k. Evlenece\u011fi k\u0131z\u0131 takdim eder ailesine. Duygular\u0131, d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnceleri g\u00f6z ard\u0131 edilerek bize m\u00fcnasip de\u011fil denir ve fikri yine reddedilir. T\u00fcm bunlar onun hayat\u0131yla ilgili olan <\/span><b>Hay\u0131r\u2019lard\u0131r.<\/b><span> Aksi durum s\u00f6z konusu olamaz , \u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc ailesine itaat etmeyen asi \u00e7ocuk yaftas\u0131na maruz kal\u0131r. Asl\u0131nda sadece aile i\u00e7i ili\u015fkilerde de\u011fil t\u00fcm d\u00fczende b\u00f6yle de\u011fil midir durum? Kendini ifade eden, do\u011frular\u0131n\u0131n pe\u015finden giden birey yada kolektif yap\u0131lar her daim zorluklarla kar\u015f\u0131la\u015fm\u0131\u015flard\u0131r.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Taklit mi, orjinallik mi?<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Empati yoksunlu\u011fu, tek do\u011frunun varl\u0131\u011f\u0131na k\u00f6r\u00fc k\u00f6r\u00fcne inan\u0131\u015f \u015fekli bu gibi durumlara neden olan daimi sebeplerdir. G\u00f6kku\u015fa\u011f\u0131 neden g\u00fczeldir biliyor musunuz? \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc her bir renk hem birbirine \u00e7ok yak\u0131n hem de minicik s\u0131n\u0131rlarda kendileri olmaktan vazge\u00e7medikleri i\u00e7in. Renklerin birbirine m\u00fcdahalesi yoktur. Her bir renk kendi d\u00fcnyas\u0131n\u0131 yans\u0131t\u0131r.\u201d Peki yedi renk yerine tek renk olsayd\u0131 ne olurdu? Hep ayn\u0131 rengi g\u00f6rmek mi daha cazip, yoksa farkl\u0131l\u0131klar ve yenilikler mi? \u00c7ocuklar hatta yeti\u015fkinlerde de durum b\u00f6yledir. Farkl\u0131l\u0131klar\u0131yla anlaml\u0131d\u0131r her biri. \u00c7ocuklar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n da kendine ait bir d\u00fcnyas\u0131 vard\u0131r. Do\u011frular\u0131 ise kimsenin do\u011frusuyla e\u015fde\u011fer olmak zorunda de\u011fildir. \u00a0<\/span><b>Taklit olan m\u0131 yoksa orijinal olan m\u0131 daha k\u0131ymetlidir?<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Evet \u00e7ocuk b\u00fcy\u00fcmekle e\u011fitmek aras\u0131nda koca bir u\u00e7urum vard\u0131r. Hepimiz \u00e7ocuk b\u00fcy\u00fctebilir, kendimizin k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir versiyonunu topluma kazand\u0131rabiliriz, ancak esas \u00f6\u011fretmememiz gereken \u015fudur ki; her \u015feye evet deyip s\u0131radanla\u015fman\u0131n meziyet olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131 gibi , hay\u0131r deyip do\u011frular\u0131n\u0131n arkas\u0131nda durman\u0131n da ay\u0131p olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131\u2026 Y\u00fcr\u00fcyorsunuz, her ad\u0131m\u0131n\u0131zda \u00f6n\u00fcn\u00fcze biri ge\u00e7iyor. Ba\u015fkalar\u0131na g\u00f6re ya\u015fayan bir insan her ad\u0131m\u0131n\u0131 onlara g\u00f6re ayarlamak zorunda kal\u0131r. Benim yolum, istikametim buras\u0131 acaba m\u00fcsaade eder misin? Demeye utan\u0131r. Bunu bazen yerle\u015fmi\u015f tabulara ayak uydurmak i\u00e7in , bazense kaybetmekten, sevilmemekten korktu\u011fu i\u00e7in yapar. Ama bilmez ki kendi duru\u015fu, iradesi, fikirleri olmayan biri hi\u00e7 sevilmez. Sevilen d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerinden, ki\u015fili\u011finden verdi\u011fi tavizlerdir. Toplum onu kendi oldu\u011fu i\u00e7in de\u011fil, kendisine ayak uyduran, ayak ba\u011f\u0131 olmayan biri oldu\u011fu i\u00e7in sevecek. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Anne baba olarak nas\u0131l destek olmal\u0131y\u0131z?<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00c7ocuklar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n daima g\u00fcd\u00fcl\u00fcp, kendi de\u011ferleri yerine, ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131 mutlu etmeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015fan bireyler olarak yeti\u015fmesini istemiyorsak sayg\u0131 duymay\u0131, inanmay\u0131, ve do\u011fru bildi\u011fi yoldan ne \u015fartta olursa olsun \u00a0vazge\u00e7memeyi \u00f6\u011fretmekle y\u00fck\u00fcml\u00fcy\u00fcz. Fikirlerinin bir utan\u00e7 kayna\u011f\u0131 olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131, aksine kendini \u00e7ekinmeden ortaya koydu\u011fu her d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncedendolay\u0131 gurur duymal\u0131y\u0131z. As\u0131l korkutucu olan kendini bulamayan \u00e7ocuktur. Kendini bulamamaksa \u00e7o\u011fu zaman onun su\u00e7u de\u011fil , \u00a0kendisini bulmas\u0131na izin vermeyelerin su\u00e7udur. \u00c7ocuklar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n kendisini bulmas\u0131na, sorgulamas\u0131na izin vermemek ya\u015fam boyu onlar\u0131 \u00e7ekimser olmaya itecektir\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u00c7ocuklar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n ilerde ayaklar\u0131 yere sa\u011flam basan, g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015flerini h\u00fcrce ifade eden bireyler olmas\u0131n\u0131 isterken ebeveynler olarak aya\u011f\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131na s\u00fcrekli t\u00f6kezleyece\u011fi en b\u00fcy\u00fck ta\u015f\u0131 bazen biz anne ve babalar koyar\u0131z . \u015e\u00f6yle ki; \u00e7ocuk hen\u00fcz k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fckt\u00fcr, kendisini bir \u015fekilde ifade etmek ister. \u015eunu \u015f\u00f6yle yapal\u0131m m\u0131 baba? Sen daha k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcks\u00fcn kar\u0131\u015fma b\u00fcy\u00fcklerin i\u015fine denilerek cevab\u0131n\u0131 al\u0131r ve [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":41,"featured_media":3751,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[23,3060,287,3059],"class_list":{"0":"post-3898","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-cocuk","8":"tag-cocuk","9":"tag-cocuklarda-merak-ve-sorgulama","10":"tag-merak","11":"tag-sorgulamak"},"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/annebebekkulubu.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/03\/cocuk-korku3.jpg?fit=626%2C417&ssl=1","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/annebebekkulubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3898","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/annebebekkulubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/annebebekkulubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/annebebekkulubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/41"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/annebebekkulubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3898"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/annebebekkulubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3898\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/annebebekkulubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3751"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/annebebekkulubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3898"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/annebebekkulubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3898"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/annebebekkulubu.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3898"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}